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Imaginary Pets of Famous People


Imaginary Pets of Famous People
(2024, 128 pages, $19.95, 6 inches wide by 8.75 inches high)

Suppose famous people such as Taylor Swift, Caligula, Brendan Behan and Adam and Eve had pets we’ve never heard about. The verses in this book give them those pets, whether they want them or not. So Conan Doyle gets a platypus, Michael Jordan gets a mouse, Tom Sawyer gets a cat, Barbra Streisand gets a flea, and L. Frank Baum, creator of The Wizard of Oz, gets a flying monkey. (Hey, they’re imaginary. Why not a flying monkey?) The verses are accompanied by dozens of wonderful drawings of the famous people by master caricaturist Anthony Jenkins, fourteen of them in colour. The pets themselves are not pictured, except on the cover, because, well, they’re imaginary. Plus, they’re not famous. Until now.

You can order this book through PayPal ($19.95 plus tax plus shipping).

A couple sample poems from the book:

L. Frank Baum

After L. Frank Baum
Wrote The Wizard of Oz
He bought a flying monkey
With retractable claws.
The neighbours howled.
They used metal nets
And piercing alarms
To protect their pets.
One neighbour produced
An incriminating photo
Of her cute little dog
Being snatched in toto.













A.A. Milne

Alan Alexander Milne
Created Winnie-the-Pooh,
With tales considered thrilln
For kids as young as two.
But Alan A. was seldom gay,
A regular grump was he.
“To ease my mind, I’d like to find
A pet to walk with me.”

Alan Alexander Milne
Didn’t want a bear,
Cuz Pooh would get top billn
Which wasn’t very fair.
“Let me explain, I’m not really vain,
But Pooh gets all the fame.
I feel rather saddo to live in Pooh’s shadow.
I want folks to know my name.”

Alan Alexander Milne
Said, “If I get something new,
They’ll talk of me, then God willn,
They’ll cease all talk of Pooh.
It sounds absurd, but maybe a bird
Will get these folks’ attention.
A stork that’s tall, and regal and all,
Should get myself a mention.”

Alan Alexander Milne
Went out and bought a stork.
It cost him more than a shilln,
But folks began to tork.
“Upon my word! The stork’s the bird
What brings newborns to you.
No ifs or maybes, Milne wants more babies
So they’ll buy his Winnie-the-Pooh!”

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